I somehow thought that I had banished the demon of misery...
I had a miserable Friday and for some work related reason - my mood dived deep into an abyss of lost causes and hopelessness...
The weekend helped to restore some balance and i thought that maybe I had put it behind me but here I am again on a fresh Monday morning feeling very weighed down by it all...
It doesn't help that I dislike my working arrangement and loathe the way i am pawned off from department to department and project with reckless abandon...
Maybe I'm looking for stability now or something that provides roots...
I am reminded time and time again of the many frustrations that plague me in the work place - the unfulfilled tasks that are left unfinished, the multiple deadlines and failures to deliver.
I sometimes think I hate it here - it used to give me joy because I thought maybe there was room to expand my vision but maybe I'm making too many wishes. I feel restricted by the hindrance I perceive here...
My job pays the bills and keeps me tied to an income stream albeit - one income stream.
I feel that I am sometimes between the devil and the deep blue sea and that human instinct for choice has been squashed...
I am beginning to hate it here - I feel deeply dis-satisfied and yet I remain...
Why in GOD's name do I feel this way?
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